Sex Tape Derby, Round 58
It's Sex Tape Derby Thursday, so saddle up them shoes and let's go. The conceit is this: Birds do it. Bees do it. It's only right that you've gotta view it. So let's do it, let's view a homemade sex tape. Of the following celebrities, whom would you rather watch get crazy? Post your selections in the comments section below.
Model (and Howard Stern squeeze) Beth Ostrosky or ...
"Sell This House" host Tanya Memme?
Keanu Reeves or ...
Matt Dillon?
posted by Chase McInerney @ 7:31 AM
8 comments
8 Comments:
Casual Friday might be getting out of hand, but now I understand why the real estate market is booming. Memme wins by a landslide, both on her own mertis and because Howard Stern is one of the last people I'd choose see doing the horizontal mosh.
Reeves, but only if his sex tape is directed by the Wachowski brothers.
I'm just going to say that both women need to ask their plastic surgeons for a refund. I've seen better boob jobs.
1. I know people who watch "Sell this House" just to see Tanya Memme dip a paint roller. Ostrosky is definitely hot but in a generic, "SI" kind of way. Memme can make home improvement look like porn. She's the Nigella Lawson of real estate.
2. Reeves, but only if Linklater rotoscopes it so that all the genitalia glows and turns fuschia and it all gushes like the Hoover Dam breaking.
1. Beth, because while she is less hot, she is boning Howard, which means any tape could include Bababooey.
2. Keanu, ditto above argument, but with Alex Winters.
I can't believe all you fellas don't know I'm gay. But I'm so excited that you all want to see me naked. XOXO
Both those girls' tits look like rock-hard grapefruit halves. Barf.
If that's grapefruit, I want Jimmy Cagney to moosh them in mah face!
I like Tanya Memme because I see her in reality just like a friend could be.
I bet it would be much more fun to meet her.
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