Un-bearably P.C.

What's the world coming to when even a teddy bear smacks of insensitivity. An AP story points to the cautionary tale of the Vermont Teddy Bear Company and its recent creation, the $69.95 "Crazy for You" bear, which comes safely ensconced in its own straitjacket and with commitment papers, to boot.

As you might expect, advocates for the mentally ill -- or, as they're known to the Vermont Teddy Bear Company, crazy fuckers -- decried the troubled bear, which in turn forced the company's head to resign from the board of Vermont's largest hospital. "The recent controversy surrounding one of my company's teddy bears will detract from my ability to serve effectively, and I cannot allow this to occur," Elisabeth Robert said in a written statement released by the Fletcher Allen Health Care in Burlington.

"Last month, Robert apologized to anyone offended by the bear, but said it would not be taken off the market [before Valentine's Day]," AP reported. "The company sold out of the bears last week and said it did not plan to manufacture more."

In a related development, the Vermont-based firm plans to roll out its This-Porridge-Makes-Me-Feel-Bloated Bear in time for the Thanksgiving holidays, complete with a furry paw shoved down its guilt-ridden mouth.