Thursday, September 07, 2006

Snakes in a Basement

Tonight the wife was combing through boxes in our basement when she came across one of these monstrosities pictured here. She came across it with her sock-covered foot.

Do many people find snakes in their home? Is this part of home ownership?

About a year ago, we found a dead crawfish shriveled up by the basement drain. The basement of our home is starting to resemble the kitchen of Golden Corral.

Earlier tonight, we were watching that great old 1950s' sci-fi flick, The Incredible Shrinking Man, and I was marveling at the scene in which the aforementioned shrinking man is trapped in the hellhole of his basement, a dense jungle of giants spiders and the like. I wondered to myself what dangers our basement would pose should I, you know, shrink. Shrink incredibly, that is.

As it turns out, it would pose a lot of friggin' dangers. When Mrs. Chase stepped on the snake, she let out a scream (and understandably so) that could've awakened the dead, or at least Radiohead fans.

Oddly, though, our baby, whose nursery is directly above the basement, remained in slumber, sleeping like the baby she is.

This is really disconcerting, as we had kinda been counting on the baby to be our first line of defense in case of snakes.

7 Comments:

At 7:13 AM, Blogger pstmpg said...

I predict that Literarytech will never again visit your home if he reads this post. He can slay computer viruses and many other terrors, but snakes are his Waterloo.

 
At 7:25 AM, Blogger CGHill said...

This is one of the few times I have actually been pleased with the fact that I don't have a basement.

 
At 8:08 AM, Blogger BlueDreamer said...

I'm hoping Literarytech get a chance to read this horrific post! One more reason not to step in that dank, nasty, snake-spider-creepy-crawly things infested basement. Yuck!

 
At 11:42 AM, Anonymous turtle said...

Snakes and spinders, no problem. Now cockroaches? They kept me out of our family's garage until I was 15. Thanks Damnation Alley!

 
At 10:44 AM, Blogger LiteraryTech said...

Oh.
My.
Fucking.
God.

Chase, you need to go get the wife a present. Something soothing and happy.

Oh. My. Fucking. God.

Please tell me it wasn't really a pit viper as depicted above.

I promise to me nice next time Bluedreamer inconveniently refuses to go to the basement. And I think I'm going to go get something nasty to put down there in the way of poison. If I kill all the food, maybe I won't get any slithery predators.

Wife-of-Chase, you need a hug and I may drop by today to make sure you get one.

Oh. My. Fucking. God.

 
At 7:39 PM, Blogger RedDirt said...

Are you sure the crawdaddy thingy wasn't a shriveled scorpion? We had one of those make its way onto our front porch about a week ago -- big and lively. For some reason, I've had close encounters with the worst creepy crawlies since a tarantula crawled across my leg when I was about three years old, playing in my back yard. I ran screaming into the house, blubbering about a "big black thing! big black thing!" And then last week, doing some weeding in one of my flower beds, I turned over a rock, and there, coiled up all cozy, was a copperhead. I was so dumbfounded that I let the damn thing slither away before killing it. And you know that saying, "Does a bear sh*t in the woods?" Well, ask me about my five-day hike in northern Colorado wilderness area some time, and I'll tell you about an up-close encounter I had with a black bear. And yet still, I have a Thoreauvian love of camping. What is wrong with me?

 
At 10:42 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don't you guys have enough animals already?

 

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