Sex Tape Derby, Round 75
Autumn leaves, Halloween, the World Series, political advertisements -- it must be October. Sex Tape Derby, reveling in the sights and sounds of fall, offers this whimsical question: If you had to watch a homemade sex video, who would you rather pick as the star? Post your selections in the comments section below.
"Grey's Anatomy"'s Ellen Pompeo or ...
"Grey's Anatomy"'s Katherine Heigl?
Babe Ruth or ...
Mickey Mantle?
posted by Chase McInerney @ 9:27 AM
7 comments
7 Comments:
Mickey Mantle! MICKEY MANTLE! Oh gawd please, Mickey Mantle.
Man Law #43:
When forced to select between two unknown hotties, take the one showing more skin.
Gotta take the Sultan of Twat, since he can call his money shot.
Other intriguing ballplayers…
Yogi Berra would supply the most bizarre dirty talk. Pete Rose would be the greatest muff diver. Kenny Rogers and George Brett would supply exotic oils and lotions. And of course Rollie Fingers needs no explanation.
1. Heigl, because I think Pompeo is the oldest 30-year-old ever. Does anybody really think she's that hot? God, I'd rather see the short, angry black doctor.
But Heigl's pretty.
2. Mr. Mantle, if you're nasty. And he was. So, so, very nasty. You'd sweat blood if you only knew.
1. You've hit a nerve. Pompeo is just downright ugly, and way too skinny. I'm with the good Dr. and can't imagine who thinks she's hot. And to have two total hotties like Patrick Dempsey and that other guy chasing after her is just from some parallel universe where ugly people get to hook up with smokin hot hotties. And she's a sucky actress too.
Heigl
2. I'm sick of baseball right now so neither.
1. Heigl. This season has been disappointed so far, and she's about the only thing that keeps me watching.
2. In the battle between two two boozing, womanizing baseball greats, I think I have to give the nod to Babe, if only because there was some pretty freaky shit going on in the Twenties, or so I've heard.
1You guys, Heigl doesn't just win by default because Pompeo is a sniveling, watery-eyed skelly who couldn't get a guy into bed without a gun.
Heigl is hotter than 1,000 suns, and if she had a sex tape, it would be a way bigger hit than "Grey's Anatomy" ever dreamed of being. Never mind watching her have sex -- I'd get chubbed watching Heigl do her taxes or clean her ears.
2. Fuck these heroic types, Chase. What you want to see is Ty Cobb giving Hedy Lamarr a "Dirty Sancho Panza," which is a "Dirty Sanchez" executed as part of a donkey show.
The Babe would do it three times, because that little kid in the hospital asked him to. (Mantle would have knocked the kid in the head with a Jim Beam bottle.)
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